My Great Grandmother I

For One More Day" is interesting because it reminds me to appreciate my family. And to a certain extent, I do. Well, I haven't called my mother for more than three weeks now. I feel guilty, of course.Apart from that, this movie really made me recall my late Great Grandmother. I missed her so much. It's hard to explain why. Let me try, anyway.My late Great Grandmother was an interesting woman. She was a very hardworking woman too, even in her eighties. I remembered when I was a little boy, I saw her keeping busy around the house. You see, since her husband passed away, she stayed in my grandmother's. She would be helping my grandmother to keep house.

Since both of my grandparents have green thumbs, they just loved to plant plants around the house. I remembered that they planted a few rows of tapioca on a hill near their house. I remembered pulling a few trees to cook the under-developed tapioca with my friends. So, when it was time for my grandparents to harvest their tapioca, my Great Grandmother would help them to clean the tapioca and peel them and wash them. Then, she would use a peeler to peel the opaque white tapioca into long thin strips. She would then soak them in water with some salt and dried them for days until those strips are really dried. Then, she would deep-fry them in a huge "kuali". I would dash into the kitchen and she would scold me and shoo me away. I kept coming back of course -- to steal those deep fried tasteless tapioca strips. After a few trips, I would just be bored from her scolding and full from eating those chips that I finally gave the extras to some red ants making a line outside the house.

I could still remember my Great Grandmother's passion about her betelnut leaf tree. She had planted a few shrubs around the house compound. I remembered those green trees crawling up to a dead mango tree and the other one just outside the kitchen. I remembered her dedication and attention to detail when it comes to her tending to those shrubs. She is really proud of them. I guess it's because she used to chew betel leaves with the lime, betel nut and what nots. I used to watched her using the "gobek" to crush the betel nuts. I could almost remember the smell of chewed betel leaves as she tells me stories. One fine day, an elderly man came to our house asking for the betel leaves. He wants to buy them because his daughter is getting married. For your information, betel leaves are among the most important things to have in a Malay wedding -- be it traditional (held in kampongs) or modern wedding (held in posh 5 star hotels). So, he asks whether he could see the owner of the tree. I ask him to wait as I call my Great Grandmother. I found her in the living room sitting in a rocking rattan chair. She goes and see the man. The man says that he wants to buy the leaves from her and she agrees. She goes to her tree and starts to pluck the leaves. She asks me to get into the house and take a plastic bag to put the leaves in. As soon as I arrive, she had finished plucking the leaves. The man was ready to pay as I could see that he has his wallet in one of his hands. He gave her RM5.00, said thank you and leave. I could see that my Great Grandmother is happy. I couldn't understand why then. Now, I know that she is happy because she had just received the benefit from planting the betel leave tree. Even though the amount is not that much, it still made her happy.

A Brilliant Movie Based on a Brilliant Novel

Mitch Albom's For One More Day

Last night, while having dinner in front of the telly, I was torn whether to watch Majalah 3 or Mitch Albom's For One More Day. Majalah 3 was presenting Air Asia X's new fleet of Airbus 330-300 on TV3. Simultaneously, The Hallmark Channel CH702 on ASTRO was showing an Oprah Winfrey presentation called For One More Day. I had a dilemma because I have always been fascinated by the aviation industry.

So, initially I decided to watch Majalah 3 since I reason myself that The Hallmark Channel might do a re-run for that movie. However, after a few channel flips, I decided to just watch "For One More Day".

At first, I thought the movie boring. But as soon as I managed to catch the plot, the movie started to become more interesting. I really like the way the plots unfold. I especially like a line said by the mother when she reveals the real deal between her and her husband -- that he married an Italian woman whom he has a son with before he returns to America. In that scene, she said, "Children should never choose". It was so noble of her to say so. The fact that her son has been treating her badly because he understood that his parents' divorced was caused by his mother.

Another line which I found interesting is when the mother said, "A son never loses his mother. She is like an echo. And when can we hear an echo? When it's quiet," right before she vanishes.

Rewarding My BEL130 Students

Not so long ago, I brought my BEL130 students to Cafe Pauh D'Layang in Hotel UiTM Penang for breakfast. They were thrilled, of course. I am glad they were thrilled. Because it's not like I was bringing them to a posh hotel or anything.

These students were rewarded because of their good (I wouldn't want to say brilliant -- because my standard is way too high for them, hehehe) performance for their sketch practice. They were rated by their fellow classmates and I.

To motivate them to really perform for their practice sketch, I have come up with the idea to treat them breakfast at Hotel UiTM with me. They agreed. These students were only given 30 minutes++ to prepare their sketch. Each group should consist of not more than 6 students (smart, isn't it? So that I won't have to treat so many students at one time. *selamat*)

So it turned out that Raja Arif, Azfar Shah, Asyraff, Rafidi, Azhari and Arif Syahrizal won the challenge. So, they were entitled to having breakfast at Hotel UiTM.

The day finally arrived. We reached the coffee house at 9.30 a.m. The boys were excited to start. Before we ate, I asked a student to recite the prayer. I also set the rule that we must communicate in English throughout having breakfast.

So we ate. In the middle of breakfast, I noticed that one of them didn't finish his food. So, I immediately created a new rule. I told them "You must finish the food that you bring to the table. No excuses." The boys agreed. They had to. Hehehe.

Asyraff is a small eater. He doesn't seem to eat a lot at all. He stopped eating when all of us were still busy going to and fro the buffet line.

We talked about many things. Mainly academic stuff regarding BEL130 itself. We also talked about a special cake recipe. It turned out that one of the boys noticed a few icing cakes on display at the buffet line. One of those cakes is yellow in colour. His friend ask "What do you think the flavour of that cake?"

Another simply replied, "Oh...that? Kek jagungla...apa lagi?"

All of us bursted into laughter since we have never heard anyone who bakes corn-flavoured cakes. Come to think of it, have you?

So here are some pictures of us in Cafe Pauh D'Layang.

My Second Theatre Experience

Gold Rain & Hailstone
A Dramalab Production at KL PAC

Gold Rain & Hailstone is a witty play staged by Malaysia’s renowned theatre activist, Jit Murad and the talented Lin Jaafar. Gold Rain & Hailstone has been staged several times with its debut -- a humble production in the year 1993 at the British Council. This two- actor play is jam-packed with witty remarks and hilarious jokes which are woven intricately by the writer himself, the one and only, Jit Murad. Jit Murad reveals that Gold rain & Hailstone “is not autobiographical but none of it is made up.”

Gold rain & Hailstone starts off with the numbers 1991 beamed from the laser onto the stage backdrop which signifies the setting for this play. Multiple roles played by Jit Murad and Lin Jaafar makes this play smooth in transition and constantly demand the audience to fiercely follow the stories presented. Zahim Albakry has made a good job with the directing of Gold rain & Hailstone. This is because with only two actors, Zahim managed to make the play lively with the multitude of characters come to life.

Gold Rain & Hailstone revolves mainly around its four prominent characters. They are Amy (an independent woman), Jay (an effeminate guy), Azman (a man’s man) and last but not least Nina (a modern city girl). These four characters are brought parallel into the story of Gold rain & Hailstone because in some way or the other all of them are connected. For instance, Jay and Azman are the best of friends since their childhood days. The both of them share a lot of memories. Similarly, Amy and Nina too are friends even before they went off to America to further their studies. Thus, based on these four characters’ stories, Gold rain & Hailstone tries to bring forth certain issues experienced by almost the majority of Malaysians going to America in the 1990s to further their studies.

The issues ‘discussed’ in the play is the dilemma Malaysians faced when they have been spending more than five years abroad – in this case the United States of America. This is because there will come a time when the Malaysian expatriate will question themselves “Should I return to Malaysia?” To these people, that particular question is difficult to answer. This may be caused by their sense of belonging to the United States of America -- the free country which is also a melting pot.

Gold rain & Hailstone tries to highlight the dilemma that is being faced by Amy. She is not able to choose whether to return to Kuala Lumpur. To make matters worse, her father is gravely ill and that she has not returned to her homeland for the past ten years. She is torn between staying in America and her father.

Similarly, Jay is also having a dilemma. He takes such a long time to consider his decisions before finally making a huge leap of faith and return to his homeland. As for Jay, he has never felt that he belongs anywhere. He does not simply fit in. This is due to the fact that he has always been different from the other boys. Jay as the name may suggest is a man who is more attuned to his feminine side. In his homeland, Jay is not does not enjoy freedom as much he wanted to. He feels as if there is somebody watching his every move and that person is just waiting for the right time to point out Jay’s mistakes. Being an effeminate male in a Muslim and Malay community is such a torment. That is why Jay feels that he is better off stay in the States. He feels more accepted in the quirky way the American seems to practice. The Americans are more nonchalant about his physical appearance and they also could not care less of Jay’s daily activities.

Nina on the other hand dreads to return to Malaysia simply because she feels that she is not ready to settle down. In America, nobody cares whether she is married or single. In contrast, Nina is being asphyxiate by her family members especially her mother and aunts who relentlessly kept pestering her to marry. They reason to her that “Orang perempuan tak elok bujang lama-lama” or simply translated “a young Malay woman should be married before she reaches the age of thirty”.

Azman on the other hand is having the time of his life as he is free to do whatever he wants to do. In America, it is acceptable for a young man to be promiscuous. This is due to the fact that Azman prefers the American way of life.

Azman, Nina, Jay and Amy are four young Malaysians from the heart of Kuala Lumpur acts differently from their typical Malaysians. These characters are not too Malay due to the education they receive and also the modern cultures that they are exposed to. That is the reason why these four young people feel that they do not belong in either the Eastern community or the Western community.

Apart from that, the director tries to highlight some authentic Malaysian tendency. In a few scenes, Nina’s mother talks to Azman’s mother on the phone. These two mothers have the habit of telling other people’s stories that they heard from ‘reliable sources’. It seems as though gossiping is some form of entertainment for them. Apart from being ‘concern’ of their gossip victims, these two doting mothers also love to boast about their son and daughter respectively. In addition, Azman and Nina like their mothers also gossips. This is apparent in the scene where Azman and Nina meets and get engaged in a conversation while attending the ‘kenduri’ or a feast. They both were gossiping about Amy and Jay. When their friends wave at them, Azman and Nina wave at them back while continue talking about the other persons nonchalantly.

In addition to the abovementioned traits, the characters of “Gold rain & Hailstone” also try to emphasize that in Asian values, especially in Malaysian context, the young must always respect the elderly and the “have-nots” are expected to have respect to the “haves”. This can be seen when Azman and Jay are being accompanied by their respective family members at the airport before their plane takes off to America. In this particular scene, Jay acts accordingly in order to show his respect to the Datuk and the Datin (Azman’s parents). Simultaneously, the audience can see that Jay’s mother is rather timid when she is around the Azman’s well-to-do family. Jay’s mother can be seen acting rather awkwardly around the Datin when in actual fact the Datin does not intend to show any sign of authority. Based from an Asian perspective, in my humble opinion, Jay’s mother knows exactly how to behave due to her parents’ upbringing. Asian has this system whereby a person needs to always present their best side whenever they are in the company of people from higher status such as the royalty and respected people (teachers, the rich and famous, politicians) etc.

Azman symbolizes some Malaysian young men who are seeking for fun and thrills in America. Apart from studies, Azman enjoys social events held around the town in which he stays. Azman makes up stories about his sexual encounter with an all American girl. He boasts that he is capable of giving satisfaction and pleasure to that girl. In America everything goes. This is especially true to most Malaysian expatriates since they are away from the watchful eyes of their ‘concern’ family members, friends and neighbours. This phenomenon can be due to the reluctance of classic Malaysian parents (especially the Malays) to openly discuss about sex. Parents see sex as a taboo subject and it is better not to discuss about it with the children. As a result the younger generation grows more inquisitive and eager to discover sex.

In conclusion, Gold rain & Hailstone is a thought-provoking, hilarious, witty play that carries a multitude of social messages to Asians especially Malaysians. Cleverly written, the issues in this play have been made as if they have never been so blatant before. This play is a good piece not only for discussions in higher learning institutions classrooms but this play can also provide useful and insightful points to discuss while sipping your cup of cappuccino at the all American cafes.

Gubra or Gabra?

Gubra
By Yasmin Ahmad

After “Sepet”, Yasmin Ahmad presents another movie which revolves around the daily lives of a woman named Orked. Yasmin Ahmad’s sequel to her movie “Sepet” is called “Gubra”. Gubra is actually a movie telling the audience about the life of Orked after her graduation from a university overseas or at least after her return from England (as Yasmin Ahmad does not indicate clearly of which version is the most accurate).

This film setting is quite complicated to determine. This is because the movie applies props that are not constant to the storyline. The director employs an old BMW car (appears to suggest the story takes place in the 1970s or the 1980s) for Arif to drive. In addition to that Alan drives an old pick-up (complements the BMW car. Jason on the other hand sells pirated CDs at the market (which suggests that the story takes place somewhere in the late 1990s till the present).

Orked (Sharifah Amani), Arif (Adlin Aman Ramli), Harith Iskandar (Orked’s father), Ida Nerina (Orked’s mother), Adibah Noor (Kak Yam), and Alan Yun (Alan -- Jason’s brother) are among the prominent characters in Yasmin Ahmad’s “Gubra”. The movie is aptly named “Gubra” because the movie starts off with Orked and her whole family went frantic because Orked’s father collapses due to low sugar count in the blood as a result of his suffering from diabetes mellitus. Orked, with her long, unruly hair went along in the chaotic scenes as her mother and the driver cum gardener decides to send Orked’s father to the hospital. The chaotic scene went for almost ten to fifteen minutes until finally the whole family is allowed to enter Orked’s father’s ward.

Yasmin Ahmad’s “Gubra” is filled with direct and indirect messages. Among the messages that Yasmin wants to highlight are religious issues, inter-racial marriages, husband and wife relationship, marriage infidelity, Malaysians’ anxiety of HIV and AIDS, community acceptance to prostitution activity and last but not least Asians’ values and perceptions of sex.

Yasmin Ahmad’s movies have been marked as provocative. This is mainly due to her “openness” and stoicism in telling her stories. It could be that she wants to revolutionize Malaysian films. Not all Malaysian finds this film interesting, thought-provoking and enlightening. However, many of the issues that the film tries to address are worth taking-note for.

Apart from the scene where Orked engaged in a playful mood with her husband in their bedroom, Yasmin also portrays a scene of a “Bilal” playfully chasing his wife in front of their son. These two scenes have the ability to create a stir among the more conservative Muslim viewers. This is because Malaysia’s Muslim community understands the holiness of a Bilal because of his duty to the religion. By portraying a Bilal chasing his wife in a playful mood is seen as marring that holiness image of a religious man. This is provocative because the audience also understands that a Bilal is still a human being and is similar to Arif’s situation with Orked. Just because of the Bilal’s position as a religious man, the audience forgets that he too enjoys teasing his wife.

Apart from that, the scene where Bilal pats a stray dog en route to the musolla or surau also creates a sense of uneasiness among the Muslims. This is due to the fact that a Muslim is forbidden to touch a dog because it is haram and thus if a person who touches a dog and perform a religious duty such as the prayers or reciting the Quran, his actions are useless as it is not lawful against the Syariah. However, it is stated that a person can touch a dog on one condition – both the dog and the person needs to be thoroughly dried. The audience will easily oversee that the Bilal is thoroughly dry and so is the dog. Thus, he is allowed to touch that dog. Except for the fact that there was no necessary reason for that Bilal to touch the dog.

In addition to the above discussion, Yasmin Ahmad seems as if she wants to say that it is okay for a Bilal and his dutiful wife to be nice with their neighbour who is also a prostitute. The neighbour, played by Rozie Rashid (Fatimah or Temah) indifferently goes about her business as if her job is a revered one. It is extremely rare for a Bilal to greet a prostitute. However, it is not the prejudice that Yasmin Ahmad tries to highlight. In fact, what Yasmin is trying to highlight is that the compassion and goodwill among human beings. It is definitely not wrong to greet a prostitute. It is the stigma and prejudices that Yasmin tries to eliminate among Malaysians. It is awkward for a person to greet a prostitute especially when the person greeting the prostitute is a religious man. But is it wrong for a neighbour to greet his fellow neighbour? Definitely not.

On the other hand, “Gubra” also tries to bring forth the issue of inter-racial marriage. This is done via Orked’s character. Orked was previously in love with Jason, a Chinese VCD player. She was infatuated by him due to his charm, calm nature and because they understand each other. However, her love to Jason ends as abruptly as it had started. Jason was suggestively pictured been killed in a road accident. In “Gubra”, Orked gradually falls for Jason’s brother (played by Alan Yun). They met at the hospital on the same day as Harith Iskandar’s character is hospitalized. Even though Orked is still married to Arif (Adlin Aman Ramli), she still goes out with Alan Yun’s character. This shows that she has chemistry with him. Later in the movie the audience are shown their similarities as they both sang an old Chinese song while having a ride in Alan’s old pick up. Obviously Arif is not too happy to see his wife being so close to her old fling’s brother. Similarly, Kak Yam is also attracted to a Chinese guy who works at the hospital. Kak Yam flirts with the Chinese guy as soon as the incident between Orked assaulting Alan with a stained and smelly hospital mop. From then on, Kak Yam acts more lady-like whenever the Chinese guy is around.

Next, one of the most apparent scenes in “Gubra” is the one where Orked’s parents are doing a silly dance movement while lying on the hospital bed. This scene suggests that the relationship between the husband and wife is good. They are both loving and supportive of each other. In addition, there are also other scenes that suggest strong intimacy of this couple. What Yasmin wants to portray here is that intimacy is not unique to young lovers but also among couples who have been married for more than ten years. It is not something funny. In fact, these types of behaviors should be condoned to ensure that the sanctity of marriage is saved. However, couples should make the intimacy gestures more subtle when they are around their children or whenever they are in public.

The issue of marriage infidelity is highlighted via the characters of Arif and Orked. Their infidelity is made apparent when Orked accidentally bumps into her husband as she is sight-seeing Ipoh town with Alan. The audience may easily interpret that Arif is at fault as he is seeing another woman. But what about Orked who may appears to be the victim but still going out with Alan? The risk of infidelity in marriages is inevitable. However, the couple can surely minimize the risk. Infidelity may be caused by a spouse or even both parties can be at fault. Yasmin Ahmad however chooses to highlight the plight of women whose husbands are infidels.

The issue of women’s plight is made apparent in the scene when Fatimah’s ex-husband (played by Khir Rahman) tries to rob her. Temah refuses to give in thus she shouted and she fights the man with all her might. The hammer that Temah takes out from her handbag is a statement that all women should be careful and alert of their surroundings at all times. Apart from the attempted robbing, Temah, who is a single mother to a 7 year old son is diagnosed with HIV positive. Her sadness is made clear by her tears that trickle down her cheeks in the clinic right after she finds out the bitter fact that she is now a carrier of the deadly virus.

Kiah and Kak Mas take Temah’s diagnosis of HIV positive very well. Maybe Yasmin Ahmad tries to convey a message telling the Malaysians that it is safe for us to befriend the HIV carriers as long as we know the risks and the way the virus is spread. This gesture from Yasmin acts as her way of educating Malaysians about HIV and AIDS.

In addition to that, Kak Mas (the young Bilal’s wife) and Temah’s friend named Kiah who is also a prostitute has to suffer in order to earn a living. However, towards the end of the movie, Kiah finally says that she will no longer have to do that job ever again to Kak Mas.

Apart from Kiah and Temah, Alan and Jason’s mother – the peranakan lady is also suffering. The Nyonya and her old and thin Chinese husband bicker all the time. The Nyonya can be described as experiencing domestic violence. Her husband is not tolerant about many things and always makes her life difficult. There is this one time when the Nyonya scolds her husband for asking for pork for lunch. “Lu ni, kalau satu hari tak makan babi, tak sah!” or loosely translated as “You can’t live without eating pork, huh?”. Here, the audience may understand that the Nyonya is tired of her husband’s tantrums and silly requests. Not only that, she has to suffer from humiliation since an elderly Muslim man and his two wives were next to her husband’s bed. The two Malay women heard the Nyonya and her Chinese husbands bickering almost all the time.

Last but not least, Yasmin’s “Gubra” is woven with some sexual innuendos since a few scenes can be considered as too graphic for children below the age of 12. In addition to that, many dialogues in “Gubra” are insinuated with the subject of sex or sexually-related issues. Malaysians are still not as open-minded as their Western counterparts when it comes to talking about sex. Sex is still considered as a taboo and thus can only be discussed with much discretion or better still not to discuss at all.

Based on the arguments stated above, “Gubra” can be considered as a revolutionary Malaysian movie as it depicts issues that most Malaysians prefer to be kept in the closet. At least “Gubra” tries to highlight these issues in a different light and from a different angle especially when it is a masterpiece from the eloquent Yasmin Ahmad.

CSD...

Cik Sham Dearest

Shamshad Begham Bt. Othman who I amicably call her Cik Sham was my lecturer at UiTM Dungun, Terengganu. She is a woman of substance. The fact that she is wheelchair bound does not really give an impact in her life. She is smart. I can talk to her about any topics at all. She is funny too, especially to those who are very close to her. She is like a second mother to me.

At 48, Cik Sham does not really look her age. It could be due to the fact that she puts on “bedak sejuk” on her face whenever she has free time. She is bespectacled. She is quite plum. However, if she can stand up and walk, I think she would definitely look slim. Sadly, she cannot walk. She had suffered polio when she was only three years old. She could not walk since she was 5 years old.

Cik Sham loves to wear her Baju Kurung. She has many Baju Kurungs in almost every colour we can possibly imagine. She told me that she only needs three meters of materials to make herself a Baju Kurung. That explains how petit she is as compared to a normal person.

She is fond of her Color Club watch. The reason behind her passion for her Color Club watch is that she can change the ring of the watch to match her outfit. She has five different coloured rings for her watch -- white, gold, black, red and green. But now, her Color Club watch is old. She is wearing a Guess watch which she bought in MidValley Megamall during one of our outings together. It is a beautiful siver chain watch with a beautiful face and interesting curvy glass. I helped her choose the watch.

She used to sit on her Yamaha wheelchair. However, in 2001 an incident happened in her house. Her wheelchair broke down. She had to crawl from her bedroom to the living room just to call her neighbours to help her get a manual wheelchair in the store room. I was sad for her. She looked very exhausted when I arrived at her place. Now, she is happy with her Karma wheelchair which she bought a month after the incident. Cik Sham had to live in her manual wheelchair for one whole month. I was then in my semester four. I would help her to push the wheelchair until we reached her house. I was sad to know that a student of hers wanted to push her down the lake just because he thinks he deserved to pass BEL 250. Cik Sham said to me that “He could not even utter a single sentence without any grammatical errors, how can I make him pass the paper?” It’s true. I know that person. I cannot imagine that he would say such a horrible thing to a teacher.

Cik Sham is still living in the same house. It is actually a residence for UiTM’s staff especially the technicians and clerks. The house is like a heaven to her. The house is complete with a disabled-person friendly toilet and bathroom, the sink in the kitchen is not too high, so she can reach it comfortably, it has 3 bedrooms, 1 store room and it is also equipped with ramps for Cik Sham to maneuver her wheelchair. She once told me that, “How I wish all hotels in the world is disabled-person friendly.” Cik Sham had not had a lot of opportunity to travel. Unlike normal persons like us, she needs a special vehicle which can carry her and her wheelchair together with ease. There is no express bus in Malaysia that is equipped with such facility. Cik Sham would have to pay hundreds if not thousands of ringgit just to get from one place to another. Malaysia Airlines System is her transportation of choice. She had to. Especially if she needs to return from Dungun to Penang (her hometown). The airplane is safe and the services provided by the national carrier are disabled-friendly. Imagine that she needs to pay a taxi driver RM 500 for a one way travel from Dungun to Glugor, Penang and another RM 500 all the way back to Dungun from Penang. The cost is almost the same, and yet the time taken to get to the same place is longer with the taxi.

She told me that her mother would always be with her when she was hospitalized and when she needed to see the doctor for medical check-ups. She has lost her mother 11 years ago. Her beloved mother died in 1995.

To get where she is now was no easy task for her. She once told me that “I hate troubling my friends,” when we were having a conversation at her father’s place in Penang. If possible, Cik Sham does not want to trouble her friends to either carry her around or to push her wheelchair. However, she told me that her friends were very adamant. They wouldn’t take no for an answer. Thus, they would go to supermarkets or shops together. Her friends would help to lift her to get in and out of a taxi. One of her friends who is now a pilot with Malaysian Airline System would come to her house to review their lessons and do their homework together.

I could not remember the first day I met her but Cik Sham can. She told me that we met somewhere between the Academic Block and Block 9 in UiTM Dungun. I was in my first semester for my Diploma in Hotel Management then. The earliest meeting with her that I can remember was when I was walking back to my hostel (Tasik A) while she was rolling to return to her office one afternoon. I smiled at her and said the salam since I knew that she is a lecturer. I didn’t know what subject she is teaching then. Allah’s willing, I met Cik Sham again. This time around, I was in my second semester. She taught me BEL 200. An easy paper for me. I scored A+ for that paper. We got to know each other quite well that semester. Then, the following semester (part 3), Cik Sham taught me BEL 250. the paper was a bit tough for me. However, Alhamdulillah, I managed to score A for BEL 250. I was aiming for an A+ because I know then that English is my forte (at least I am better at it than other subjects -- especially accounting subjects).

When I was in semester three, I had a breakdown. I felt that I could not continue my studies and I wanted to quit. To me all of the pressure to pass all of the subjects was unbearable then. Upon hearing this from my closest friends, Cik Sham arranged for a meeting. She gave me tones of advices so that I will not quit my studies. “I see the potential in you, Anizan. Don’t give up. Take it as a challenge from Allah” she said. I hated her for stopping me from quitting then. After a few weeks, I managed to pick myself up and face the challenges. The semester went by smoothly.

What she said was true. I shouldn’t have the slightest inclination to quit. I should see things the way she is seeing them. To compare myself to her, she has suffered so many things in her life. But she keeps going. She never ever uttered the words “I give up!” Believe me. I have uttered that sentence for quite a number now. I am not strong enough emotionally. Cik Sham is. I look up to her.

Following her advice, I managed to get through the tough and trying times in completing my Diploma in Hotel Management. Then in 2002, Cik Sham told me that she wanted to pursue her studies at the graduate’s level at IIUM. At that time, UiTM Dungun wanted all of the lecturers to have at least a Master’s degree to be able to continue teaching in UiTM. With the scholarship from UiTM, Cik Sham went off to Gombak, Selangor to pursue her studies at the International Islamic University of Malaysia.

Even though we were now separated, Cik Sham would once in a while send me letters to keep my spirit high. She does not want me to give up on my studies ever again. Her letters would always be full with advises and

Cik Sham has managed to get herself a Master’s in English Language Studies with the International Islamic University of Malaysia (IIUM). I was there on her convocation day. Seeing her on the platform receiving the scroll from IIUM’s Chancellor, Duli Yang Maha Mulia Sultan Haji Ahmad Shah Al-Musta’in Billah Shah was a motivating experience.

Princess Fiona

Anizan Bin Sulaiman,
Fakulti Pendidikan,
Universiti Teknologi MARA,
Kampus Seksyen 17,
40 000, Shah Alam,
Selangor Darul Ehsan.





Dear Princess Fiona,

I am sorry if my letter makes you late for your mud-dipping party with Shrek and Donkey. How is life in the Swamp? I’m sure your married life with Shrek is going marvelously. I am Anizan by the way. I am not anywhere from the Fairyland. I am living in the real world where Fairy godmothers don’t exist, where donkeys can’t talk, and where frogs don’t simply turn into princes when they are kissed by their true love. You may think I’m weird. But could you please continue reading? I just have a few simple questions that I would like to ask you.

During your childhood, you realized that your parents treated you differently. They were not the traditional parents when it comes to parenting you. I am sure that you were puzzled when they won’t let you to be with the other princesses especially at night. I guessed you have never attended a slumber party in your life, right? How do you feel? Do you always feel different? Do you always consider yourself the odd one out? Do you feel depressed? How did you handle it, Princess Fiona? Have you always known that you are -- umm-- how shall I put it? An ogre?

I, however admire your parents’ effort in sending you to a close security tower distant from the Far Far Away Land. Not in a bad way, of course. I know that they love you so much, but I also understand why they had to do what they had to do. Speaking of Far Far Away Land, I have another question for you, Princess Fiona. Almost all fairytales start with the phrase “Once upon a time, in a far far away land, there lived (some princess or whatever….)”Oops…sorry. I have deviated. I was getting to your parents. Did you just accept your parents’ wish to send you to that horrible place? Didn’t you feel scared -- to live there alone, locked in a tower which was being guarded by a fire-breathing dragon?

Princess Fiona,

Will you tell me the truth? What did you feel when you were kissed by Shrek when in actual fact you were lying there in your tower waiting for your Prince Charming to break the horrible spell? Did Shrek scare you? I think you were not afraid of Shrek since you seem to master some kind of martial arts. However, you agreed to follow Shrek as he promised to send you home. You were brave.

It was clever of the producers to reveal that you are actually half human-half ogre. I didn’t expect the beautiful princess Fiona is actually an ogre at night. I am sorry if you feel offended by my bizarre questions. I am just curious, Princess Fiona. What is your favourite colour by the way? I bet it must be green. Hehehe…

When are you planning to have children with Shrek? Do you want your children to be ogres too or perhaps you want your children to be born humans? Princess Fiona, will you be kind enough to tell me one of the best and also one of the worst features of Shrek? Do you consider Shrek as a romantic husband? What is the most romantic experience that you have ever experienced with Shrek so far?

Princess Fiona,

How does it feel like to live in a fairytale? I can see that it is not always fun and happy to be in a fairytale. Let me give you an example. First of all, I am sure that being bugged incessantly by Donkey must not be pleasant. Apart from that, knowing that your father is actually a toad is not something to be proud of. I definitely would like to hear your comment on this. Last but not least, it must hurt you so much to have finally found out that you are actually an ogre -- a creature that even your parents are squeamish about.

I have been wondering of what would happen after the princess ended up marrying her prince charming. Usually, a fairytale would end abruptly as soon as the princess is married to the love of her life. Would you care to tell me about your life after marrying Shrek. Is there any difference as compared with the time when you were still single?

Princess Fiona,

I think that you are fond of Donkey. However, I still have to tell you this. I find Donkey almost all the time a nuisance. I also find him extremely funny at times. How do you handle your life with Donkey tailing you around all day? Why is Donkey always around Shrek? Does Shrek have any other family members except for you? Where are his parents? Does he have any siblings? If he does, are they also green?

Dear Princess Fiona,

I thank you for spending your precious time reading my humble but bizarre letter. I would really appreciate it if you could reply my letter. I hope to hearing from you soon. Take good care of yourself, Your Royal Highness.


P/S: Go easy on the snail soup. They are umm…quite fattening, don’t you think?

Your sincerely,
Anizan.

You Are My Star...

Dear readers,

This is my poem which I wrote for my Creative Writing class when I did my TESL in Shah Alam. I hope you'll like it. I had some references, of course, but to tell you the truth, the words are all mine.

The persona in my poem is a person who is feeling lonely. The person is away from family and friends. Longing to be home. Longing to engage in a conversation. To forget his loneliness, he decided to look at the night's sky, hoping to find solace.

The tone is quite melancholic.

I chose to write my poem with the stars as the metaphor because the stars are just magical. The fact that they are balls of fire makes it all the more interesting to me. They are so beautiful.
So, here is the poem and tell me what you think.

Stars

Looking out of the window at night,
I wish to see the stars sparkling brightly in sight,
As I sing for my broken heart.

Red, white, blue and green,
The stars on the heavens,
Like jewels of the night’s sky,
Soothing if one wishes to see it with compassionate eyes.

The stars,
In their thousands,
Flickering and glistening,
Rich with a myriad of colours,
Adorning the vastness of the galaxy.

Each night I wait,
For the stars to perform their charming magic,
Splashing colours on the black canvas of the midnight’s sky.

I patiently wait for them to blink,
As if they are dancing,
Looking at me and wink,
Mesmerizing.


Anizan Sulaiman